Just something to think about....I face this often. Here's the scenario. I've just come in from a full day of work. My kids are finishing up their homework. They want to play. I want to sit down for a few. I may have a project or something "I" would like to work on. Maybe I just want to sit down for a few. Maybe I want to watch Sportscenter. Insert ______________ that YOU want to do. Sometimes it's me wanting to work on a "dream" project. Something that I love. They want to throw the football, or have me watch them do flips or swing. Or play dolls. Or fill in the blank.
Here's the thing I read in a book called, Quitter by Jon Acuff: "The problem is that kids don't believe in later. As parents we might think that in a few years, when they're older, our kids will appreciate and maybe even understand the long hours we put into following our dreams and working, but they don't. Kids believe in right now. That the only reality they understand. I've never heard a 13 year old say, "My dad really wasn't around for the first ten years of my life, but I have a really nice bike now, so it all evens out." Kids don't say that. They might not have the ability to verbally communicate what it means to be lonely as a 6 year old, but they are when we ignore them for the sake of pursuing our dreams to create a better later."
You can't substitute "later" for "now" with your kids. You can't substitute "later" for "now" with your spouse. It just never evens out. That means that we have to HUSTLE at other times. But don't cheat that time with them. We may have to get up earlier or stay up later to do those things to chase our dreams. But don't take the time from them.
In a similar example, the last time we went to DisneyWorld, I told my wife that everytime my then 4 year old daughter asked me to pick her up and carry her, I would say yes. Why? Not because I wanted to carry her around everywhere. I did, because I wanted to remember that time. The next time we go to Disney, she'll be too big for me to pick up and give her a break. But not that trip. Everytime she reached those arms up to me, I said Yes. And I carried her. And I got tired. But I did it because of my love for her....and the joy of the "now" and not the "later" that she wouldn't understand.
This was a good reminder for me. By the way, the entire book Quitter by Jon Acuff is worth reading!!
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